Saturday, May 19, 2012

Coffee Stains, and Fluffy Cats

I am feeling very productive this week. First the takeover of Good Day Sacramento, and I am now sure that my favorite flunky Minion-A is not working for Super Stud! So far, other than a few minion setbacks I am feeling rather good about things.  I have been feeding Minion-A wrong information for weeks now, all leading up to the trap I set using her as bate. The plan was to send her out on a fruitless mission to see if I can coax her benefactor out of hiding.  There is no way she could have known my true plans were in fact not to steal more Paragon Isotope from Foster Labs, but to rob the carrier van that contained and seemly harmless device called the Fluff Modulator. Used by groomers all over the world to fluff those poor excuses for dogs. 

The brilliance of my plan is that I don’t need the Fluff Modulator for anything I am doing; It’s a gift for Catastrophic. In fact no one, not even I, knew of the plans to steal the Fluff Modulator today, I had planned to spend my day working on the helmet that should protect me form Super Studs Super lame power.  I had only heard of its arrival by carrier van after I had sent Minion-A on her mission of recon.

I figure if Cat insists on throwing those poor creatures up into trees, no matter how many times I tell her doing so is just mean, not evil, she is going to have to do something to make her victims more likable. By the time they get the poor beasts down they look so mangy, people tend to be more appalled at the varmints then actually feel sorry for them. I thought if she could fluff them before she throws them into the trees. Make them more cute, then mangy, maybe it would help people feel sorry for her victims and then fear her just a little bit more. Let’s face it that girl needs all the help she can get!

Had Minion-A been working for Super Stud as I first suspected, he would have been guarding Foster Labs at 3pm and not getting coffee from THE HUMAN BEAN right as I was making my get away. 

He threw his coffee at me! 

Do you have any idea how hard it is to get coffee out of cape fabric?  That crap stains like a Mother@#@#.I knew I should have scotch guarded it before I wore it out, but Noooo it was new and I wanted to wear it. I hate that Super Stud.

Luckily, my heist was so random and unexpected; he was unprepared for my sudden appearance. A supersonic scalding hot coffee bath was the worst he could do to me. I had too much of a head start. 

I am no closer to finding out who Minion-A is working for, she is held up in the woods somewhere waiting for my signal that says it is safe to return…I guess I should send up the signal…eventually. They say it’s only an 80% chance of rain tonight, so there is no hurry. In the mean time I am getting great pleasure out of picturing Super Stud scratching that deep-chocolate-sexy-TV- doctor head of hair of his trying to figure out what kind of sick, dastardly deed I have planed for a pet grooming device.

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